29 February 2008

Still Sucking After All Of These Days

My days are continuing to suck. Allow me to apologize now for the lack of a real Friday post, but I still have no network at the house. I'll make it up over the weekend or something, I promise. I love you! (smooch) Sorry, was that too pushy?
Thanks in advance for your understanding and feel free to browse my favorites in the right hand sidebar.

28 February 2008

I have to apologize for how much this sucks today. I honestly don't even know where to begin, and I'm sure that even what I say will only graze the kind of day, nay week, I am having. Actually I can promise it will barely graze the kind of week I am having. And to make matters worse I really want to ride, outside, and not have a foot and a half of snow since last night. Ugh.
Ever have "one of those days"? You know the type, even though it's not Monday the...
"looks like somebody's got a case of the Muhndays" days.
Yeah, well I'm there. The kind of day you wish your brain was an Etch-A-Sketch so you could just turn your head upside down, shake it, and have it just go blank. The kind of day where you realize that for all of the work you've wanted to get done, you've actually got about 3% of it done, and it's Wednesday. The kind of day where you deal with your local cable company (not a huge fan of formerly Adelphia, now Time Warner but it's all I gots in my area) for about an hour-thirty only to find out that after getting pissed off by them that it was a magnet shielding issue+router=SUCK! Yeah, like...
kind of suck. for those of you keeping track, that makes two strikes. You know how they say things can only get better? Let's just hope so. In fairness though, I'd sum up things as not as well as some, better than most? That sounds about right, just trying to keep positive. I'll try to be happier Friday, OK?

27 February 2008

Weekly Roundup February 27

Yeah, it’s Cleveland… and it’s February… and it’s a constant 20ยบ high, snow, ice, sleet, more snow, melting snow, rain, wind, more ice, and (yup) snow! I guess I’m not the only one with this problem though, with that friends; The Weekly Roundup!

Let’s Rock…: I have to, first, apologize for not throwing love at what is arguably one of my favorite blogs to read. I guess knowing that Yeahdog is out of Chicago I feel a sort of bond that I’ll call “The Hell’s Of Lakefront Weather”. Anyway, Reflections On ½ A Season Of Winter Biking is a fun little post that talk about her love of the winter, and her looking back on it being like this all her life. She says it gives her street cred, I think it’s just crazy, yeah I’m a wimp… and I don’t have an appropriate winter bike, just saying.

Miles And Madness: Another blog I’ve recently added to the “Quiver-O-Blogs”. The first sentence of 14 says it all “It was supposed to be sunny with a high of 38 which is nice running weather. They lied. Not only was it cloudy but as soon as I headed out the door it started snowing.” Yup, it’s winter in Ohio, Cleveland is worse though. She also had me at Yum.

50K Loop NS: Where to start. Bluenoser throws in an appropriately weather related blog about the ToC. In case you missed it ToC. Is a humor filled take on how crappy the weather was at the Tour of California (or should I say Tour deee California?) which wreaked havoc on the riders. Also had a great rip on Cipollini.

Cozy Beehive: An added Cipo rip can be found at Mario Cipollini’s Bikes: Cracking The Code. Ron does his best to crack the mysteries that are the new bikes of “Super Mario” Cipollini.

Bunny Hop Rockstar: Where do I even start with John? I think he may have lost it with this one, but I also think it was a riot. My wife and I laughed till it hurt, without further adieu Nothing To Do With Cycling.

As usual, I’m the Phun Cyclist, you stay classy Cleveland.

26 February 2008

The Truth... Hurts?

This one was just too good to pass up. Those of you who know me well, or I guess since I started the blog anyone who's been a fairly active reader of Cycling Phun, know that I lost my father some years ago now to cancer. A very large part of his cancer was due, quite probably, to the fact that he was a half-pack to two-pack a day smoker depending on what was going on in his life at the time. So I think it goes without saying that I really hate cigarettes, really. I saw this and my wife and I laughed our asses off. I laughed so hard I almost cried. With that, I plucked this one from the guys at thetruth.com, enjoy!

25 February 2008

An Ode To Tiramisu

Whilst talking to my wife this weekend I came to, what I thought was, a brilliant realization. I could almost completely live on Tiramisu. Egg yolk, sugar, mascarpone, espresso, dark rum, lady fingers, bittersweet chocolate and cocoa powder all come together in the orgy of joy that is Tiramisu. Definitely NOT lowfat, or Adkins, or on any diet for that matter, but quite possibly a perfect food. The only way to enjoy it more is with a glass of dark rum, straight up, chilled glass. Now, I will agree that you probably couldn't eat Tiramisu every single day, so I figure you can alternate between Tiramisu and Cassatta Cake. For those who may not know of the Cassata that I speak of, I am referring to the following. Layer of an Italian pound cake, soak in rum, cover with a cream and sheep milk ricotta, layer in strawberries, more cake (I suppose you could throw in rum if you wanted again), and frost. Again, excellent served with a glass of rum. Let me take one of my famous sidebars to say I prefer scotch, but that's neither here nor there. Wow... I'm realizing two very important things here. One, I may have a problem with alcohol, and two I need to keep my butt out of Little Italy.

22 February 2008

An Open Letter From Lance

Those of you who know me know that I totally want to kick the crap out of cancer, what you might not know is I am also buried on any given day with politics or advocacy. That's only important in this sense, I'm no doctor, so that's out. I'm no chemist, that too is out. What I feel I can do, and what everyone out there could and should do is this; we need to band together with time and money to kick cancers ass! I think a lot of people want to do a lot more that they do for causes they feel passionate about but they don't. Furthermore a good portion of the time it's not their fault, they just don't know where to start and how to go about making change happen. If you want to help make a difference, know that it could be as simple as $5.00 to a cause, or an hour of time, or even 15 minutes to write a letter to your government officials to share what is important and on your mind. If you are interested in contacting your officials is it very easy o find out how to reach them online, heck drop me a line in my contact me in the upper right hand corner and I'll help. It doesn't take a lot to make a difference!
A big part of what sparked this is a form letter I got today from the LAF Folks, here it is (below) please take a minute to read it, and check out their site LiveStrong.org

Right now, the nation's eyes are on Texas, Ohio, Pennsylvania and several other states that have not traditionally played a deciding role in presidential primaries. In my hometown of Austin, the airwaves are flooded with commercials, the candidates are everywhere, but what's missing is an honest dialogue about how to fight cancer.

Yesterday, I was convinced we had done enough to start that dialogue at the Democratic debate. I submitted an op-ed to the Austin American-Statesman: Armstrong: Candidates, Texans have spoken: We care about cancer. The LIVESTRONG Army took to the streets. I called in every favor I could think of.

Yet despite our efforts, here in my own city – where my Foundation is headquartered, where thousands have turned out to support our cause – we still weren't able to get the candidates to tell us what they'd do about cancer.

I said a year ago that I was getting impatient, and now I've flat out had enough.

I've had enough of the media and candidates ignoring the 560,000 Americans who will lose their lives to cancer this year. I've had enough of the blatant disregard for the nearly 12 million cancer survivors alive today and the challenges that they still face. I've had enough with a government that says cancer is a problem but won't fund the necessary research to make any real advances.

I've had enough, and I need your help.

If you are getting this email we know that (1) cancer has affected you in some way and (2) you live in a state that has yet to vote. I need you to help me get the candidates on the record. Flood their rallies, attend their debates, overwhelm their town halls and ask them one of these questions:

"What would you do to decrease cancer deaths in this country?"

"Would your administration be in favor of a national ban on smoking in public places?"

"If elected President, would you work to significantly increase funding to the NCI and CDC?"

Let's get the dialogue going.



21 February 2008

American VS English

*This is a tribute to my buddy in blogging Bluenoser. In appreciation of his added vowels and “eh’s”. He dropped me a line and spelled favor, “favour” and ended a sentence with “eh”. He’s Canadian, and it got me to thinking about a couple of things that we in America have sort of botched. I still think you guys up there have it right up there bro!

American vs. English – A while back I said I was going to talk about the things I think Americans have sort of corrupted. This is going to be a quick soapbox about where I think we have it all wrong. I want to preface this by saying that I love the US, and I mean no disrespect or ill feelings toward the US. I live here, I think for the most part it’s a great place to live, and we have a huge number of freedoms. With that said there are some things we ruined, I think we have a tendency to ruin things sometimes. With that, I give you my soapbox.

Subaru, Audi, Porsche (I could go on but digress) vs. Chevy, Ford, Chrysler. Need I say more?

I’m just going to say it once. In America we play a botched game of Rugby. In England and all over Europe they play football.

Finally, Language:
So the other day I got into this argument at work. I made the statement “we speak American”. I made this statement quite intentionally and by no means incorrectly, in my mind. You see, in my humble opinion we, in America, don’t really speak English any more. I say that because I think, and you can correct me if I am wrong, we have ruined the English language. Therefore I would like to propose that from this point forward we call what we speak what it is, American. Furthermore look at our spelling. Two, too, too. Or what about know, and no? Know and now? It’s just insanity!

20 February 2008

Weekly Roundup February 20

I’m still too disappointed in the contest results, and thus a bit too peeved to really write. With that I give you, The Weekly Roundup!

Fat Cyclist: Fatty gets me ticked off with his post, Exclusive! Details Of Shimano’s Acquisition Of Pearl Izumi. You may be asking yourself “but why would you be ticked off?” I’m glad you did, I now have nothing for tomorrows post. That’s right, he beat me to the punch! To make matters worse, it’s a freaking riot!

50K Loop NS: Bluenoser wrote a really interesting post recently looking at a side of cycling I think few ever think about. Kids is about that, a story about kids and their interest in bikes. A throwback to the simpler times, and how important a childs bike is to the child, and a touching wish to his recently married daughter. Class act Thomas!

Cozy Beehive: This is why I totally would feel weird riding a carbon fiber bike. Dubious Frame Cracks is a quickie about the cracks that are showing up a little too frequently to be coincidental. For a longer, but equally cool read, Kano Diagram Applied To Cycling is a good read covering Kano in relation to cycling goods and service.

Bike Snob NYC: BSNYC alerts us of another sign of the apocalypse is upon us in Apoca-Watch Update. Everything from Cipollini’s return to cycling, to the ghost bike, and finally the Apocalyptic Horsemen update.

Well that’s all I got folks, I’m the Phun Cyclist, you stay classy Cleveland.

19 February 2008

Cyclepassion Giveaway

Wow, Valentines was truly a sad, sad day. I don't know where to start with my disappointment of the entries in the Valentines Day Cyclepassion Giveaway (AKA: The VD Giveaway). First off let me start by explaining the later "AKA". I was working on limited space on a dry erase at work, and wrote "HAPPY VD!" Yeah, I know... and no, I didn't catch the faux pas, at first anyway... and yes, I did at some point catch it and erase it... and no, I did not have a sexual harassment charge brought up on me. OK, enough of that.
Anyway, for those of you paying attention to the Thursday blog, I ran a "tell me your best Valentines story win Cyclepassion stuff" contest. I think the best story I got was Harp making lobster for his lady. I say that very loosely, since it turned into a debate between him and Bluenoser about lobster vs. snow crab ending in Judi's comment that her cyclist boyfriend did the big squadoosh for her. I felt bad at first, but after finding out he had (what based on her blog) sounded like some suspect dental surgery the day before.
Long story short is this; I think that I am obligated to give the three of them prizes based on the fact they were the only ones who posted. Further I can't decide if Harp should win for doing the lobster or Judi should win for playing nurse. So I think this is how it will go down; one calendar & two posters later I'll give the calendar to Judi (for her or her boyfriend) since playing nurse is pretty sweet and totally unselfish. Harp will receive the Rita poster, and Bluenoser will receive an Emilia (the poster, not the woman... I'm not THAT good). If anyone cares to drop a BS card on me for my decision I will take submissions for appeal until this Thursday, at which time I will be readying the items to send. Likewise, I need Judi, Harp and BN to use the contact me to get me their mailing addresses. Here's hoping the next contest goes a wee bit better, right?

17 February 2008

Weekends Suck

They really do. That's not to say there aren't good things about weekends, but there are parts that just suck! For example, all wee I work, I eat relatively well, not much, drink buckets full of water at a time. Weekends however I don't fare so well. I have taken to swimming again for the winter, and I'm desperately trying to get the hang of the rollers to a point where it is effective as a form of exercise. The problem in this whole equation is as follows:
Weekends are made for grazing. There I said it. Weekends have way too much free time in them. Especially in the winter, ya know when you really don't need an excuse to just not do a thing anyway. So it's easy to pull out the excuse book and say "It's too cold", "It's an ice storm", "Too rainy and cold", etc. Add into that it makes the average person crave comfort food, and the fact that I swear I have Seasonal Effective Disorder (depression brought on by the shortened days), and a wife who is a great cook, throw in the fact I love to cook and (to a large extent eat what my wife and I cook) love to eat what we cook it all adds up to disaster.
A perfect example of this; I got in (a minimal) ride on the rollers, and then preceded to go for a nice swim... After having Southwestern Potato Pancakes. Or tonight's dinner of the single best homemade spaghetti, garlic rolls, and caesar salad that my wife has ever made. Did I mention that we polished a bottle of wine and some Great Lakes Brewing Company Conway's Irish Ale? I swear that I'm going to be up, like, ten pounds tomorrow.
With that said I need to be able to ride, outdoors, not on a road bike (again I remind you if the snow and ice situations). There is only one solution to this situation; I must acquire a mountain bike, and soon. Hmmmm, I think I just might know where to get a sweet deal too!
The craptacular mountain bike (of doom?).

14 February 2008

I'm Giving Away More Stuff... Cyclepassion Stuff, Get It?

<<<<< ADDED 2/15/2008>>>>>
I will keep this open through the weekend, and decide he winners on Monday! So PLEASE leave your stories in the comments and I will choose winners Monday, Thanks!

Get it? Cycle P-A-S-S-I-O-N, like "il mio amore, yearn per il vostro amore", like Vallentines Day (any want to critique my Italian?). Anyway it is VD, uh that's just not right, Valentines Day and what better way to show passion on Vallentines Day? Your absolutely right! I'm giving away more Cyclepassion swag! *courtesy of Anke and the crew over at Cyclepassion* So I kept kicking around just what would be the perfect way to give away scantly clad women (and men) on posters (and a calendar) on Valentines Day. Here's what I came up with:

Guys- first off let's admit it, if you have a special someone in your life you (like me) are probably luck she hasn't had the sense to run while she could. Think about it; we're guys, we think like guys, we act like guys, and if you ride probably spend way more on yourself than you do on you lady. Need I go further?

Women- You guys put up with us, for that I'll cut you a break. Im going to make this easy on you. As far as the Calendar and posters, hey... they are what they are. you get the calendar there are some guys in it, mind you not many, but it's tasteful and artsy, right? If you're not into it yourself, give it to the guy in your life, I have a feeling he'll like it.

OK, with that I want stories! What (guys) was the most romantic thing you did for the lucky lady in your life. I'll give bonus points if it involves bicycling (since thats what the blog is generally speaking about), and double points if it's something I could later use to impress the lady in my life, cause I'm probably going to steal the idea. Lady's you could go the "most romantic thing my significant other did for me" route, or the most romantic thing you've done for them. (*Guys if you complain enough I'll entertain what your other did for you as well, at minus 3 points, got it?)

Well, I hope you get the gist of the contest, again:
The most romantic thing you've done for a significant other, or your other has done for you.
I will employ the assistance of my wife, and my "mushy friends" (again that doesn't sound right either) who are into romance to pick one grand prize winner for the 2008 Cyclepassion Calendar, and three runners-up will each get one Cyclepassion Poster.

Well that's it folks, leave your entries in the comments, guys you may want to read comment for tonight, and the winners will be chosen and announced very soon.

Happy Valentines Day! Thanks for reading, and good luck!

13 February 2008

Weekly Roundup February 13

I find it hard to believe that it’s already week two of February. I’m thinking it might be time to do something insane and impulsive, but more on that another time. For now I’d like to point out that tomorrow is Valentines Day! For any beautiful women who might be interested I am accepting gifts, a size 17 is perfect, hardtail, 29er if it’s not asking too much. Nah, the wife won’t mind. You know, she’s cool and… Oh, sorry, bit of a sidetrack, with that friends; The Weekly Roundup!

Cozy Beehive: Quickly becoming a favorite blog of mine. This week Ray does up a really nice three parter on a Princeton University mechanical engineering student / Espoir National Time Trial Champ who is working on a practical racing bike made of bamboo. Bamboo Natures Composite Part 1, Part 2, & Part 3 follow through some of the buildups they have done, and their findings. I really can’t do this justice in the limited space here, you just need to go and read it.

Fat Cyclist: Along a similar line, Fatty chimes in this week with I Am Not Impressed By Your Wooden Bike. A story about a 16 year-old boy and his homemade wooden bike. In the post Fatty points out the severe flaws to his design, missing pieces, weight issues and on and on. Further Fatty points out the materials the he himself has made bikes out of. It really is a hugely funny read.

50K Loop NS: My brother from another mother up in Nova Scotia puts in his two cents with Where Are All The Mountain Bikers?. Apparently I don’t need to BUY a mountain bike, they are just left around for the riding, hmmff, something I did not know, but fascinating! A good read once again from Bluenoser.

Bike Snob NYC: BSNYC brings yet another best of, er… worst of, Craigslist NYC Crap! Worst Of Craigslist Bike Ads #46-#50 is your typical crap-fest of high quality poo! More Pista’s, track bikes with top tube bars, hubs, hubs, and more hubs, potatoes, and the “stealth street rocket”!

Well as usual, I’m the Phun Cyclist, you stay classy Cleveland.
*By the way, someecards rocks.

12 February 2008

Craigslist Strikes Again, And Again, And Again...

So for years now I’ve been a huge fan of Craigslist. OK, not really, but it does make for an interesting read, seriously. Today I hark back to a great little post this weekend. You know, typical weekend at Craigslist:
Bike, crappy bike, some free pallets (recycle or firewood), formula, some spare bike parts, dudes wife, moped, antiquated Apple printer.
What? Wife? Oh, yeah… some dude has his wife on Craigslist. Not just has his wife on Craigslist, but has her listed in the “free” section. For real! OK, you don’t believe me… Well, I guess I’m glad I got a screen shot of it then before they removed it! (click it to pop to bigger picture)
Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me. Hmmmff, you don’t believe me.

Also one more time we have the re-listing of the craptacular mountain bike (of doom?). (You can click it if you really WANT to pop to a bigger picture)
That’s right folks, this polished turd apparently didn’t sell the first time, maybe on account the bar ends?! Regardless of why, it’s back on the market so don’t miss it this time!

Finally, I will come up with SOMETHING to do for a contest THURSDAY! Thats right folks, I will give away the Cyclepassion 2008 Calendar and posters! I will have three more posters and one calendar to give away, so be on the lookout Thursday. In case you forgot what the look like check em out at the Cyclepassion Store.

11 February 2008

The Question Of Cars And Bikes

The question of car/bicycle or bicycle/car safety has come up quite often in the past. It’s actually come up recently for that matter. This weekend Fatty posted Both Sides Of The Windshield, a flashback and follow-up to a previous post called An Open Letter To The Passenger In The Green SUV Who Screamed As He Went By Yesterday. Also, there was a recent How To Avoid The Bummer Life post called Excuse Me While I Get Up On This Thing, that in combination got me digging around for other posts on the subject. Reading further posts on said, as of yet unmentioned, subject got me wanting to take up a soapbox of my own. Those of you who truly know me well know this might prove both difficult and interesting, but I will be keeping politics out of this post, no use for that here.
After reading Fatty’s blog, I thought about how some cyclists might exasperate (to say the least) some drivers. I’ve noticed the guy who blows in between cars, only to blow through a red light and just disregard all semblance of law. I know as a cyclist I’ve seen it and thought, “because of crap like that, I’m getting flicked off on this Saturday’s ride.” I even took it a step further by bringing to mind the following question, one that I’ve been asking myself for a while now:
Is Critical Mass doing more harm than good for cyclists and the sport as a whole.
Now, I’ll give you this; Critical Mass has virtually nothing to do with the sport side and everything to do with the commuting side, but isn’t this logic kind of warped? I mean, CM seems like it’s truly a case of people trying to prove whose proverbial stick is biggest, if you get my meaning. It doesn’t seem like they are really making a difference, unless you call pissing people off and perpetuating road rage making a difference, and I don’t know that it’s the difference I’d want to tie myself to. I will admit, I think the point they're trying to make is a good one, I just think they're going about it all wrong.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, as no doubt I’ll probably get some good and bad, but please keep an open mind and try and keep it at least PG13.

08 February 2008

Spin Sale! (call me fanboy)

Congrats to Spin Bike Shop for another successful year of business, culminating in making the Bicycle Retailer And Industry News Top 100 Retailers of 2008 . Last night they had a great party, showing off all of the 2008 gear, everything was on sale, and the place was packed wall to wall. Odds are pretty good if you live near, you were there, but if not don't fret! The sale is continuing through this weekend. If you're looking for a closeout bike (or any closeout merch for that matter), you'll need to take a trek out to the Lakewood store. If you're just looking for a great deal on tools, clothes, accessories, whatever you can hit Willoughby or Lakewood.
Last night brought the camera along to get picts to share, I took exactly zero pictures, sorry... I did manage to steal the following from John, I've been good at bogarting pictures lately... Hope he doesn't mind.

07 February 2008

A Very Public Thank You

Allow me if you would a moment to both thank and express dislike for someone I think of as a dear friend in the blogging world, though I don’t really know him outside of the blogosphere. OK, so not really dislike, but you'll get the sarcastic point as you read. Ya see, the story goes a bit like this.
A while back I was posting about getting a trainer. I was quite anxious for it really, but then had a bunch of people basically talk me out of it. They said I wouldn’t really get into it, and that sometimes people actually walk away from it hating being on a bike afterward. John from my LBS (local bike shop for you outsiders) actually went so far as to suggest I hold out for a basic mountain bike, go figure. Well, long story short I thought that sounded like a good idea. So I was talking about it in a past post and Bluenoser
dropped me a line that he had some rollers to give up after buying a trainer himself. So he recently shipped them to me, and I just know I’m going to wind up regretting this.
Anyway, I just wanted to take a minute to both express my dislike of Bluenoser
for his quest to completely break my tubby ass, and thank him immensely for what I consider to be his hugely amazing generosity. Thanks again BN, that was truly a cool gesture on your part, hopefully we’ll get to ride up in NS someday!
For those of you who are interested in reading a really great, funny, entertaining bike blog, check Bluenosers blog out. It’s called 50K Loop NS, and it’s by far one of the best I’ve read!

06 February 2008

Weekly Roundup February 6

Happy Day After Fat Tuesday! I have a limited amount of wit today, due to the workload, but an extreme exuberance due to the Paczki! (POONCH-key) For those of you who don’t know, it’s a Polish thing. As a matter of fact it is THE Polish thing, the one you have on Fat Tuesday. It’s kind of like a jelly doughnut, only filled with jelly, fruit, or custard. Oh, and did I mention delicious? Or that I stole the following picture from Yeahdog? With that friends, The Weekly Roundup!

Fat Cyclist: Let me start by saying first thing to do is go to Super Tuesday, while you’re there, click th ad and check out the info on the LAF site. Once you’ve done that check out Rock Racing Q & A a great look at the wonderment that is the Dope Racing, er, Rock Racing Team. No doping allegations here! Once you’ve done that go to the home page and start from the begining.

Let’s Rock…: This week, my fave female blogger is a bit too political for me. Once again, there is a saving grace, and once again it is PACZKI! If you must deal in politics, at least you get Paczki!

50K Loop NS: I laughed, I cried, ok so I didn’t really cry but I laughed my butt off! Why Two Wheels? is Bluenosers dilemma to understand the seemingly overlapping differences between Trials Riders and Unicyclists. He points out how they seem to know what they are looking for but don’t realize they’re missing the obvious answer.

Cozy Beehive: Everyone pretty well agrees I should’ve been an engineer, but alas I am not. The reason I like Cozy Beehive is that I totally dig his mix of bicycles and engineering. It’s an absolutely fascinating read.

Finally, but arguably more important, the cycling world lost a sort of icon this week in Sheldon Brown. While I was not terribly familiar with Sheldon's life I can say that he touched a lot of people, and certain seemed to live each day to it's fullest. Condolences to Sheldon's family on their loss. You can check out many tributes throughout the web, these are just a few of the sites tributes, listed by site name:

Bunny Hop Rockstar
50K Loop NS
Travels With A Tin Donkey
Bike Snob NYC
Belgium Knee Warmers
Bicycle Diaries
Bicycles And Icicles
Bike Commute Tips Blog
Chasing Wheels
Human Powered Transport
Kent's Bike Blog
Bike, Chicago!
Roc Bike

One thing is certain, Sheldon was appreciated and loved. In the end, isn't that really what we all want? His legacy will go on for an eternity on the net.

05 February 2008

Pimping Burritos & Bicycles

With the talk about team Slipstream Powered By Chipotle ®, I got to thinking. My first thought, which I've expressed in a roundabout sort of fashion is what cyclist in their right mind would eat Chipotle? Fer serrious, I mean isn't that like sacrilege in cycling? Wouldn't that be like a pizza bender, or a Big Mac Attack ® to the average cyclist? So how as a pro team do you justify pimping bikes and burritos? Furthermore, the burritos aren't even arguably healthful burritos. I mean, they're not like a three white, one yolk scrambled egg, no cheese, with a touch of Cholula for taste burrito. They're like full on fat and carbs burritos.
So, you can imagine the chuckle I got when I found this:on the Chipotle site. That's right, a bannered Felt promoting the cycling team. What is the world coming to? Do we really have to ruin all that is good and sacred as a culture, man? Hmm, I'm seriously going to have to expound on that one... later. Seriously, what's next? Oh, on a side note, the do have a somewhat boring but questionably funny game (can you call it that?!) here on their website.

04 February 2008

Cycling Phun Phake News: New Teams Edition

04 February 2008
Cycling Phun News Service

As many of you might know, and as reported 8/11/07, Slipstream and Chipotle have got together in sponsorship of a team this year. While one would think this would be a good thing, it’s not. For starters their teams weight gain has increased by a whopping 536%. Why just in the last week two of their riders broke their carbon bikes based on sheer weight. Apparently they have also had some IBS problems due to the insane amount of Tabasco consumption on the team (Please note, Chipotle only serves Tabasco. I prefer Cholula, just saying).
Other problems abound as there is not only continued rumors of Team Hardee’s “Powered By The Monster Burger”, but other rumors are now coming to light. The latest rumor being Team Jack and Diet “Powered by Jack Daniels and Diet Coke”. The rumors may have been substantiated by the following video of what's believed to be their training camp.

So what will happen in 2008? It remains to be seen, but stay tuned and enjoy the ride.

02 February 2008

Happy Groundhog Day

Apologies for skipping class yesterday, but as penance I will throw out a very appropriate Saturday post. That's right kids, today is (in a good portion of the world) Groundhog Day! So, Happy Groundhog Day! For those of you who either may not celebrate (I'm told there are a handful of countries that do not), forget the folklore, or just could care less I will give you a brief rundown on the holiday.
Groundhog day is a day where we just short of deify the groundhog (marmot, woodchuck, ground squirrel) for its pseudo-psychic qualities. You see, the fat little booger (the animal not the man) come out of his home in the ground. If the clouds are out he doesn't see his shadow which means winter will soon come to an end. A rave party ensues and the world must repent since God hates raves. You see, God was OK with raves until we blew it in the 90's and turned them into the crappy parties that they became. But I digress, back to the groundhog. If he comes out and sees his shadow, six more weeks of winter ensue. At which point a mob is formed, and said groundhog is turned into meat to later be served at Taco Bell, OK that may be a lie, but it makes for a good story. The funny (ha ha funny) part of the whole story is this; the only reason for a male groundhog to come out this time of year is to hook up with a fine groundhog lady-friend. You see he comes out of his hole in the ground, finds a nice lady, takes her out for a nice dinner, some dancing or a movie, oh, sorry. Right so his love interest is the only thing that would bring him out, then.
And there you have it! The joy that is groundhog day. With that, a picture that I Googled of a large man with a large top hat holding up a large groundhog, enjoy and Happy Groundhog Day!